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2 of my fb friends got married this weekend and 9 posted pictures of their babies. I slept in all weekend and didnt have a use for pants on Sunday. I win.

I refuse to deal with anyone elses paranoia, over reactions, ridiculous behaviour and mental health issues. Go stroke your ego in someone elses life.

See what you are instilling into the minds of your children? They have actually already started displaying this trait. All 3 of them!

Bitch, the fact that I don't want to fight you doesn't mean I couldn't fuck you up. It means I'm classy and you're trashy.

If I could give you one thing in life, I would give you the ability to see yourself through my eyes, only then would you realize what a piece of shit you are... #ecards