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Today I ate a coffee cake because they stopped buying Triscuits

“I pooped in my Dad’s man room and ate half of it.”“I ate Grandpa’s birthday cake.”

I ate The Couch, Moms mad at me.

“I ate all of Mom’s brassiers… ALL of them.”

We ate our guest’s dinner while she was in the shower.  It was good.

I ate a thong and pooped it out whole.

My name is Leilani. I just ate all of the puppy poofs from the pantry!

It has been 0 days since I last ate underwear

I ate all the cat poop out of the litter box, then threw up poop all over Mom’s clean carpet.  :(

I hump the cat and I don’t even buy him dinner first. ~ Jessie