~I can identify with this passage. I desperately want to change, to do what I want. NOT to be bound and caged like an animal by illness, weakness, fatigue, pain, guilt, sadness, disappointment, isolation, fear, embarrassment, loss. I want to live. I wanted more than this. I'm tired of fighting to try to get the health care (in Durham Region, Ontario) I need because physicians pick and choose their patients the ones that truly need medical attention are turned away because of the medication…
and that's how it goes living with Fibromyalgia... Glad that I have now accepted it for what it is instead of wasting my time and precious energy trying to make well people in my life understand. No more guilt either, it IS what it IS whether understood by others or not, period.
THE DARK SECRET OF THE CHRONICALLY ILL? How messy our homes can become...! When you are too tired to clean, or even walk across the room and put something away, how do you keep up with the clutter and mess?
I know you think you saw how I felt, but you didn't. You saw a tiny sliver of me. There were so many tears. There was so much suffering. It was one of the darkest most excruciating times of my life. I'm still saddened by it all. Whether or not you want to believe it.