Narcissistic mothers teach their daughters that love is not unconditional, that it is given only when they behave in accordance with maternal expectations and whims. As adults, these daughters have difficulty overcoming feelings of inadequacy, disappointment, emotional emptiness, and sadness.
Thirty Healing Affirmations for Daughters of Toxic Mothers, written by Rayne Wolfe, originally posted on the blog 8 Women Dream, but taken from Randi G. Fine at http://randigfine.com/30-healing-affirmations-for-daughters-of-toxic-mothers/.
Everything the narcissistic mother does is deniable. There is always a facile excuse or an explanation. Cruelties are couched in loving terms. Aggressive or hostile acts are paraded as thoughtfulness. Selfish manipulations are presented as gifts. Criticism and slander is slyly disguised as concern.
"This sad, extreme example is more common than you might think. I have known daughters who felt tremendous relief when their narcissistic mothers passed away. They feel delivered out from under a huge burden, but guilty about admitting it." — Karyl McBride (Will I Ever Be Good Enough?: Healing the Daughters of Narcissistic Mothers)