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This can be a challenge at times but looking at the negative can really ruin a situation. When you find who you are and what makes you happy then why would you want to relinquish that to yourself or another. Being by yourself and setting your goals is rewarding because you are directing your life. Don't look for another person to do this for you , own it and work on it. People will come into your life that compliment you and your life will be better for it. Forget the past and live now.